My friend Amy is a bitch. She makes fun of me all the time. And she has the memory of an elephant. (I said MEMORY Allen, so don't run back and get me in trouble.)
Unforunately, she's also beautiful. And other people like her and there is nothing I want more than to be liked by other people. (Not to be confused with THE OTHERS on Lost, they can go to hell for all I care. Unless there are any hot gay others, in which case, my number is... How much do you think an "other" makes?)
So as long as she's beautiful and popular, I guess we can be friends.
Love,
Brian
EDITOR'S NOTE: Amy's not really a bitch at all. She just made fun of me today. And, well, you know how I can get!
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