Brian's No Good Very Bad Day

I am in a bad mood this morning like you've never seen. That bitch Hurricane Katrina has nothing on me today. So, word to the world, "Don't fuck with me or I'll mess you up, bitch!"

Being that, so far, you've been cool, let's dish on some other douchebag: a Mister Tony Tripoli. This fag is appearing as some fag in the mother of all fag shows, no doubt brilliantly written by the hilarious, handsome, and (I need another H-word) horny Rick Andreoli -- who I am sure already knows his last name bares a remarkable similarity to "areola". Mister Self-Important Nobody, not Rick but Tony, has an interview in the icon of journalistic integrity, the Paper of Record of sorts, if that record is what you use to beat off too and then simultaneously use to clean up the resulting mess. Miss Trip is interviewed in Frontiers Newsmagazine. (As if the "news" part was an afterthought.)

Clearly the Divine Miss Slut was interviewed because of the press machine behind Fashion House -- which I am sure is the greatest show on television. (Unfortunately, the cable people won't let channel 13, or rather, My13, come on in High Def and I just can't tolerate the pixelated "old stuff" on the roommies rediculous television.) But for some reason this bitch spends the majority of the interview, or what the writer chose to write, talking about Kathy Griffin.

Apparently, he was one of KG's "best gays" and was even featured on her reality show, which, honestly, I've never seen. After a decade of being in her shadow, I mean, of being her friend, KG and TT split -- along with his roommate and friend Dennis Hensley. TT and DH haven't spoken to KG in over a year. It's all her fault. How do I know? TonyT tells me. Even though, he doesn't want to...

You see, all Big Fat Tony wants is "to live in a world that has a little more kindness." He actually said that! The bitter fag actually said he wants to live in a world with a little more kindness. Do you know what else he said?

Kathy is the sun in her world and everyone else is planets revolving around her.

One friendship that has endured is the one between Tripoli and Hensley. Their chemistry was apparent the first time they met at a party, among a group of people watching a Vanessa Williams biography on the television. Both were annoyed by her speaking voice, which they decided was just a bit too self-important... “I made a rude remark, he agreed, and we just knew in that moment we were best friends who hadn’t met yet,” Tripoli says.

But before they began working, Tripoli was a little concerned about working with the actress, who is a staunch Republican.

Once the show airs, I’m hoping I can walk in here with a little bit more of an attitude. I can’t wait to have an entourage. That’s my plan for 2007, to be totally insufferable.

Mother-fucking-Teresa! Call Pope Benny, make this bitch a saint, today!

Assaulting a "former" friend and her ego. Political bigotry. Self-importantly ridiculing the self-important. And he wraps it up with a little auto-fellatio. Baiscally, he's the UN and Miss America all rolled up in one. He's flowers, and dew drops and puppies! I bet he cums Wendy's Frosties and keep fresh fries bedside for you when you're done. He's all kindness.

Of course, I'm not. But then again I've never longed "to live in a world that has a little more kindness." I like my world edgy and hostile. It makes me look like a fucking prince.

It's funny because at the end, he says that he aspries to be the Gay Oprah. Hey, bitch, we already got one and her name is Kathy Griffin.